Thursday, September 4, 2014

I will beat the information out of you

Every time i go out it's the same. I have a better time than the previous one.

This town is crazy. It is occupied by lunatics. And i am the biggest one of them.

I am picking off from my last post, which was when i was about to meet Fabian @ 6:30 to visit the Systembolaget (only place where you can buy booze). I get in the center 6:30 sharp and i see even more weirdly dressed people climbing the lamps in the middle of the street. Smile for the camera!

Let's just casually climb on the lamp.
Right out of the H&M magazine people dressed as witches, kings, queens, archers, goblins. I approached them sneakily.

"Can you give me a good smile for my blog?"

"Sure, if you give us 10 crowns!"

"Whhhhat? What for?"

"We are in a competition!"
"Ok but you have to give me a really great smile!"

They cheer like they won the lottery and get together in a semi-circle, singing something i have no idea or recollection of. I take two photos and i wink at the sexy lady in the grey dress. Oh i actually gave them 20 crowns.

They sang a song for me!
I turn around and Fabian is staring at me. Haha. We greet and we gps our way to the closest alcohol shop. I buy 3 Newcastle beers, he gets 4 and i have some fun eyeballing the swedish blonde staring at me on the next counter. I pay 47 crowns for the beers and 1 crown for the bag. Eco-friendly.

We get his bike and move to the local ICA to get some food for our hosts. Chips and a nice dip sauce, hand made by Fabian.

He gets his bike, texts me the location of the Flogsta party and i m on my way to the bus. Number 2. I greet Jose in a beer shop and i reach the bus stop where i find sam and stephanie, which is a relief because i have no clue where to stop.

Weird super-cool asian guy from canada studying pharmacy talks to us. His voice is not very manly, but he has loads of humor. Good luck with your studies man.

We stop at the Flogsta ICA and we head towards Evelina's apartment. The building number sequence does not make sense. The door is unlocked. We get in. The apartment door is unlocked. We get in. Try that in Greece, it will be fun they said.

Get the party started on a Wednesday night.
We greet each other swedish hug style, which i am beginning to love because i miss the physical contact in Greece. And to bust a myth, it feels genuine and warm when they do it. Or maybe i just happened to bump into the right people, because all the girls and Evelina's boyfriend and Holger are amazing and i  feel lucky i will be part of their team for 2 years. Thank you for hosting us!

Which reminds me i sucked and did not remove my shoes. Did i wear new socks? The horror comes in my mind. Nah i always do i smell great.

I enter the house and there is this sooooo cute old black labrador like doggie staring at me. Thank you Sarah for bringing her! I eat chips and try Fabian's sauce while i drink my shitty warm beer. I entertain most people for a while telling them about the cultural differences of greece, what i like, swedish words i know and utilizing my ridiculous humor to the maximum. +5 points for Greece! Fabian had a nice streak of laughter at then too and i was pretty amazed by the level of swedish he was speaking in only 3 months here. Pity he had to leave early around 21:30 because he lives in stockholm and he had to get the train.

Doggieeeee <3
More photos, time for a game, while Sarah shows us how to lift up dogs like cattle and more people arrive. We get Kate, Erik, Tom, Lena, DJ, Sanna (who is not blonde!), Cecilia, Isabelle who is like an incredible blonde angel, Kostas, Ingrid and a thousand people i forgot about probably. Hey, let's give an honorable mention to our always smiling beautiful host Evelina.

We played a game, King's Cup. It was a drinking game and we choked thirty times during the waterfall phase. Erik, don't pick up whiskey as your weapon of choice next time for a drinking game. But you are a Viking so it's alright.

I also met Eve's boyfriend Olivier and he is thai boxing so i told him i will beat him up one day.

Game ends, it's time to start packing up, more fun, more discussions, more swedish phrases. I think i will not forget Skål easily! I drank some liquor from the FC Barcelona boutique and we got ready to go to the club at Norrlands. Which i am a member so free entrance bitchesss.

I am alone at the bus stop, most will bike their way to town. I casually take the bus and pick up Holger, Tom, Stephanie and Sam because they also have no bikes from the next bus stop. They think i am a magician because they did not see the bus stop 200 meters before the one they went for.

We gps our way to the center and walk towards the club making fun of the English national team. We meet up and there is a massive queue. We ninja our way to the front like proper greeks while i take 30000 more photos.

Say hi to Dimitris Blaster!
We get in i pay two crowns for Ingrid's coat and 11 for mine. That was so Colombian Coffee Kelly.

What the hell? Everyone is dressed! I get with Tom to the dance floor and we pick beers. Tuborg beers for 30 crowns or so. We pick a spot and dance to tunes i have no clue about. More photos. I need action. I pick up Holger and we talk to strangers. Each picks a target an the other one has to approach and take photos. Wow at the swedish greek goddess. If you give me her name i will cook you greek food. Holger picked up some really weird targets. But we had so much fun.

Name please?
Holger has the mooooves :D
My confidence is ridiculous but when i am in the mood it's sky high. Holger says "this girl". I point my finger at her and tell her "Come here NOW".

She obliges and gives me the world's cutest smile. Thank you.

Hello there!
Ingrid is amused from what i do and tells me the girl behind me is checking me out. Hey there Madle :D More photos! I find her a swedish dude that dances a bit with her and they exchange numbers. I am an asshole and i see her less interested so i go pick her up from the shoulders and take her with me to dance. The poor Swede is shouting "Call me ok?????". Beta male sorry.

Smile for the camera!
We have some more fun, we dance a bit more, Tom's and Holger's moves are the bomb. We go outside and i walk my new friend towards her bike while my friends bike home because i am a proper gentleman. And an idiot it seems you will see why.

We get there, we share a moment and i let her bike home safely because she is a bit tipsy and i am not like these assholes that take advantage of women. And i am F@cking proud of that.

I wait 20 minutes in the bus stop. I feel a disturbance in the force. I smell adventure and pain in my feet.

Three swedish boys come and tell me that there is no bus but they live close to my place so we start walking 6.4km at 2:00 am. They are supposed to know the way. I establish some authority and tell them i box so they are intimidated. A lot actually. They ask me random stuff about greece and one tells me he has 2 sisters and that i should not touch them. Funny. We share some stories and even more stupid stuff about turkish yogurt.

We are in a forest and i keep my finger ring tightened and my keychain wrapped in my hands. I am having fun but i am always alert of something fishy. I come from Greece bro.

"I hope you know the way" i tell them.

"What if we told you we don't or try to take you to the wrong place", one of the says.

"I will beat the information out of everyone of you", i stamp my authority.

After 1 hour of walking i can see the Gottsunda mall. Wow. I practically run home. I get in my bed. I see 13 facebook messages and 15 notifications. Snap back to reality rabbit.

Goodnight and Goodmorning Uppsala. With some more weird photos.

Θελω τη μαμα μουυυυυυ!
Tom's got the moves brodah.

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