Thursday, April 17, 2014

Confessions of a cuckold

"I hate you for what you are doing to me, i hate you."

A flash of light from the dying lamp, diving. Faster than the eye can follow. Screams from the captain to get into bed or punishments will follow.

She replies. "I feel nothing for you after what you said. Goodnight i am with my friend."

An overwhelming tidal wave of emotions hits him, crushing like the sea on the rocks. Like a massive rollercoaster, from pain, to agony, to crying. And then nothing. Plunged into the abyss, feeling empty, like death had come to reap the souls of the once cheerful people of a village pillaged by war and decay.

Phonecall ends. He stands, looming hopelessly. No purpose, no cause. He is disconnected from the world. Hundreds of soldiers around him running to their bunkbeds, cheerful after sharing a laughter on the night gathering. He feels this is the end, after all, he has lost everything.

After 5 years of giving his heart and soul, his empire crumbles down like paper hit by a tornado. He knows he is alone for 9 more months. In one moment, he lost his soon-to-be wife, his dog, his family, and sadly, his only friend. Her.

By then he had only suspisions, not concrete evidence. But soon lady luck smiled on him, giving him a Pyrrhic victory. Alyx forgot her facebook logged in in his cellphone back in that unforgetable summer they spent together. And he was unfortunate enough to read everything. He would propose in 17 days, when he was released from the training camp. That was the only time she cried before the face to face breakup happened in December 8th, 2012.

"What am i going to do with the ring now?" he sobbed, trying to conceal his pain and suffering from the rest of the soldiers.

"What ring??" She was oblivious, she never saw it coming.

"I would have asked you to marry me stupid bitch, why couldn't you wait 17 more days?"

Silence, then sounds of a woman crying. It's comforting that it felt like she believed it.

Tough months followed. but the first two were the hardest by far. Pain, suffering, lies and persistance to get her back. Only mistakes were made. And now, one and a half year on, he cannot forget. But he has made his choices, and she paid her previous ones.

Stumbling upon a book called "The Game, by Neil Strauss", refueled him with pathos and passion for life and the excitement he lacked. Again he had a purpose. He needed to get back in the dating game, or so he thought. He thought that that purpose was solely to be able to "game" every women he craved. But there was something lurking behind that. Something that it secretly grew and spreaded like a virus untill it became crystal clear. He was not there to pick up women. He was there to lead men, to become social, the heart and soul of each company, to entertain people and to fulfill his ambitions.

Fast forward 17th April 2014. In 4 months he is leaving for Sweden. He has the best friends he could ask for, whom he met through his own volition. He is happy and on course to achieve his life goals. Gliding, probbing forward.

Thank you Aggeliki, Venia, Vicky, Mairy, Biktoria and Sakis for being part of my life. Special thanks go to Yiannis and Nicky, who let me be part of their company.

Being revengful bears no fruit apart from personal satisfaction, and this comes from a scorpio. Being dumped on Valentine's day is a good enough revenge of it's own. Life's a bitch, and a wheel that keeps spinning.

 Oh yes.

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