I haven't felt in a long time. Truth be told, I have felt anger, respite, compassion, laughter and relief in the past year. Mostly negative feelings. But I had not have feelings for another woman since the footsteps on the beaches of my heart were washed away last year.
Last week I met someone that reminded me how it is to feel for someone. How your heart fluffers at the moment you see them, how you want to get to know them and your mind makes up dozens of scenarios of how things could turn out. How you see them gliding, not walking and making the room brighter like a bonfire. A bonfire that I would want to dance around.
I told her that the first things that went through my head were 3. That I wanted to take her to the rooftop, hug her, kiss her and look at the stars and exchange stories while looking at the moon. That I could see myself grabbing her by the hand and going all over the world to explore it. Lastly, that she was indeed not walking, she was strutting around, gliding with a certain invisible aura that enchanted me from the very first moment. The indescribable feeling that overwhelms you sometimes and whispers to your soul from all your pores "I want to know this person, I need to know this person".
As I finally got over my shyness and talked to her, I realized how right I was. She is like the moon. She is so timid, shy and sensitive and sometimes tries to hide it from the world. But then there are those moments where she is full, like the full moon and it is just impossible to look away, because she is beautiful.
I told her that even if nothing happens, she will be a landmark in my life, because she reminded me of how it is to feel. We are both in similar situations now, where we just want to be happy and free spirits, like a wild stallion galloping across a sandy beach when the waves are just crashing down. She may not know it yet, but others are in the dark and she just shines, others just rhyme but she does it from the heart. She is a blessing in disguise and the most adorable, bubbly expressive personality I have seen in a long time. I don't write much but when I do I try to warrant the post's existence and this post deserves my time.
I hope she continues to shine bright like a diamond and shed some light into my life for we are the heartbeats of a true heart.
Goodnight Sweden
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