Don't be a prisoner! I am released! |
A star cannot shine without darkness. After darkness the light always comes. The Earth and sky blend into one, shinning bright. It will banish your fears, it will send you only sweet peaceful dreams that are palpable and you can nearly touch them.
It is really easy to be consumed in darkness. I guess a bit more when you live in a place like Sweden! Apparently a one night stand can last for 6 months here! Joking aside, I seem not to be able to let go of these bonus posts, at least every once in a while.
I was lost in the dark for a few months now. Instead of watching the sun being plunged into the sea and splashing the waves with the most beautiful unique crimson red color I was watching it plummet and get devoured by the dark. But no more. This is my ascension. This is my story. My last post was about faith and compassion and love. This post is about being ruthless and selfish.
A few years ago I learned not to trust people. Trust for me is the building block of the human soul. It is like water and food for me. In order for something to be successful you need to base it on trust and with collaboration, love and caring this trust grows into a snowball, a wrecking ball that gathers momentum and can break the toughest of walls and blow them into a thousand tiny pieces.
During those 2 years from 2012-2014 I became a shadow of my former self. I was on a quest to find out who I was and what I wanted in life. Then I took the decision to move to Sweden, a decision that is the best I made in my life even though the honeymoon is over and I have my own problems. But as I rose from the ashes of my own fire I realized recently that if trust gets broken, if trust gets shattered then how do you rebuild it? How do you allow yourself to love or trust people again, merely because of your own memories? Do you still try? Or do you cut all ties with that memory like a rotten limb?
The difference with me and some other people is that I accept my past. It takes me a while but I embrace it. This time I took it much better than 3 years ago. I will not give my past the finger and forget, because that is what a fool does. A smart person will forgive but not forget and they will move on. Sometimes you cry a lot for a reason, but when that reason is over or that little hope you had is extinguished then you have no reason to cry anymore. Through difficult situations you also see who is next to you and who truly cares about you. No matter how far they are and no matter which distant land they reside in, be it Greece, Portugal or Finland and Cyprus they can still send you their positive energy.
When I was little I had this lust and passion for revenge when something bad happened. Some attribute this to my astrological sign, the scorpio. But not anymore. We have a saying back home: "Ρόδα είναι και γυρίζει" which translates to: "It is a wheel and it spins". That means that the wheel spins and it will lead us to new ways, new roads and new paths, because life is like that wheel, it makes its circle. But the fact that the wheel spins around does not mean that your cheating loved one will come back at your door one day or your backstabbing friend will get what he deserves. No, don't be a hater. Don't give them more value. Be the light in the darkness and do not wait for people that left you because you will spend a whole life waiting for them to return. Live for now, live for after. Put your faith in the light.
I have done mistakes in my life. But I always confronted my fears and tried to be completely honest about things, even though they could hurt me more. And I am damn proud of that. I am the shinning light and the heartbeat of a true heart. And when You, whoever you are, that has left me, treated me badly, treated me with disrespect or toyed with my feelings or trust decide to come back, to talk again, to apologize, I will forgive you. No, I have already forgiven you.
And I am already starting to shine.
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