Wake me up when september ends

New month, same trouble :D

This is more like a 4 day recap since i was falling behind and now with the start of my lectures it's becoming increasingly difficult to do it every night with only 4 hours rest.

Friday was the last exciting day actually, since i rested on saturday (more on that later), i casually went out on sunday and today was my first experience in my new university.

I had an invite to go to Varmlands for clubbing but i guessed the queue would be big, so i decided to crash into Snerikes for their last "summer" party. The area was big, the music was meh and when i got there at approx 9:20 there were not many people yet. I paid 80 kronor for the entrance fee and 20 kronor to let them keep my coat safe because i am a rich idiot. I had my extra peacock belt with me anyways.

So i did not see anyone i knew. Strangely. Oh wait, there was Despoina from Thessaloniki. We talked and talked and talked and complained, made fun of some fail dancers and after 20 minutes she introduced me to her company, 3 italians, an irish girl and a german dude. Don't ask me their names, all i know is that they made fun of gay people.

Then Ridhima came, with her trusty Pleb in her bag. I teased her about her humongous mouth. She looked very pretty too. Then we went a bit inside, where i got a shitty Heineken beer from New York for 33 crowns. It was crowded, with many dancing monkeys and unheard music that everyone seemed to know but me.

I went to the bathroom. It was intimidating. It was like being in the "Blue Lagoon" bar from the Police Academy series. 10 men with their tiny junks out pissing on the ground, the wall and occasionally in the right hole. So i said to my self "You will piss in 5 hours Kostas, it's ok!" and i washed my face. Half a meter on my left there were two black people, one with a black vest and a fedora hat.

"Al muhajir toulseman mastur", he seemed to say. Twice towards me.

"English??", i replied casually.

He laughs.

"Pissing is like fucking", he says.

"Whatever makes your day dude. You can piss, i can fuck".

"NOoo" he says.

And i left.

Went back, picked Ridhima, and Wacko Kevin from Illinois joined us. I taught him some stuff about women and pick up, he started shaking my hand, asked my friend if she is bisexual and then started saying "Fuck the cops, fuck the government". I got a nice picture of him too.

Atomic mustache on the right.

More people join us. It's Gregor, Amy (luv u!), King Harmeet, Danika, Alice, Natalie, Raymon, Phoebe, Kevin Falafel, Cecilia, Laura. It screamed like fun. We went to the upper floor where they had 2 separate rooms each with wannabe hip hop rnb and electro music.It was so hot we were dancing for a bit then went outside for some air every 5 minutes. It smelled like sweat and really bad cheesy lines. Some of our friends got some action, good joooob :D

Guess the Swede....hint, she is on the left.

Took Kev and we went downstairs to diffuse some sort of situation, he ordered one beer, he got two, we drank a bit and went back up. Alice danced her ass off, i danced a bit with Danika before i broke her heart (sorry love) and we took approximately 25 thousand selfies.

Everyone's here! I told you the King is the coolest dude ever.

As i was dancing a woman approached me and told me "I am so hot right now".

"Go boil an egg", i tell her.

Finally we went down for some air and we decided to get foooood :D I grabbed my coat, number 116, and the guys said let's go to McDonalds. They had bikes. Bastards.

So me and Natalie ran, yes ran at 1am with Phoeb's as support until she gave her bike to Nat.

We reached McDonald's, people ordered and we sat there on a big table messing around. I am on a diet and Danika started feeding me potatoes from what was like whale oil and chicken something. On the table there was some leftover rat-burger that i called 7-week-old guacamole and Kevin almost choked from laughter.

German Engineering.

I threw some potatoes to the flat-ass "seemybracozmyasssucks" swedish lady then asked 2 swedish girls on the table to take photos of us.

"No" she says.

"You suck, let me buy you a glass of bitch" i tell her and move with a smile.

Without the mustache.

We made a tower out of leftovers, took more photos, we tried to guess how many times everyone had sex and we also made Gregor uncomfortable. Bad Danika.

I went for the last bus. There was none. I followed Nat, Raymon, Danika with bus number 11 for the first time. It said Gottsunda central. I hoped.

I sat with Danika, we chatted about our past lives. Raymon slept. Twice. Like 15 more people. A guy actually shook him to see if he was breathing.

So they eventually go down and we continue. It's me and a swedish girl with big headsets sleeping. Suddenly, in the vast nothingness of space the driver stops, asks me to wake her up, which took me 1 minute and tells us it's the last stop.

Good job Kostas. Welcome to adventureland. I ask the driver, he points me to a direction. The woman follows me and i hear her coughing on way. I asked her if she is ok. She says yes but she is cold. I offer her my coat and we have some small talk. I accompany her because i am a proper gentleman. But another gorgeous woman occupies my mind so i don't care. I keep walking. For 20 minutes in the woods in an empty road purely by instinct. I want to pee but i would probably set things on fire.

I finally see something resembling a mall. I am there. I am so tired. I make it home. I pee 25 litters of beer and drop dead on my bed. Goodnight Sweden.

It's saturday. I am trying to set up a meeting with my angel. Time passes and i am eager to see her for a movie. I got Need for Speed. I get dressed with a smile on my face. We cancel. I am a sad panda. It's ok, i will survive..

So i take it out all on the Colombian Coffee. Σε μισώ. I make Kelly lose 35 pounds from laughter and i sleep.

It's Sunday. I do nothing until 5. I talk with my angel. I set up a meeting with Dimitris to fix my phone and find the BMC faculty. He is 15 minutes late so i fix my phone and call my sweetie and tell her not to read so much and come for a walk.

Me and Mitsos go in a park, we walk for 3km back and forth and we are lost. We suck. We go back to Norrlands pub and we get beers and a nice burger. I am so hungry here i ate it with tomatoes and eggs. Yes it was my first time eating eggs. I actually video called my mother and told her there, i was that proud.

Vita's coming and we sit there for 40-50 minutes. Dimitris goes home and i walk her back to her place. I am never washing my right cheek again!

Monday babies. I wake up at 6:30, get out of bed in 6:48. I am ready by 7:27 and i got to pick up the bus that leaves at 7:39.

Intro class with info in the Geocentrum. Easy stuff, cool professor, straightforward class. We finish at 09:00. I manipulate the printing room guy (nah he was so helpful, thanks!), i get my student card, my student account id, my library card. I meet more Greek's, i ate a sandwich for 16 crowns and a classic fika cake for 20 crowns. I download my pdf's and lectures and i decide to go home at 10:54. I pick up the bus, i am at home by 10:18. I start studying at 12:12 after entertaining Kelly. I finish at 14:24. I am dressed and back to the Evolutionsmuseet for my first lecture. We find the room after some trouble. I sit with the video-game addicted french girl. Colombian coffee is absent.

I type all of my notes and then we got a movie called "Sun". It was not so sunny because the professor's netbook made the movie get stuck and out of sync. So we used mine. I was so sleepy.

It's over. I get home. I go to the nearest ICA, buy bread, yogurt, redbull, and some liquid death because i am tired. I am at home. The landlady has Alzheimer's because she double booked the same room to two guys. Davide will be homeless. I am tired.

Goodnight Sweden. Goodnight Uppsala.

Oops, i Uppsala'd again

Wednesday 27 August 2014

"Grrrspssss"

I get startled and increasingly worried that something will ruin my perfect day. It sounded like a bomb or someone puking out his intestines.

"Grrrspssss"

For the love of god where is this coming from. I look around in agony. Who is trying to ruin my perfect swedish day?

"Grrrspssss"

It sounds closer. Doom and gloom. Oh there he is. He is actually sneezing. Can you go die in another corner please? Oh wait?! What is that?!

This looks fishy...

Let's take a closer look.

Run, the fashion police is coming!

So he is sneezing like his heart stopped for 10 seconds and he is wearing two different types, and colors, of shoes. Good job!

So it's 12:24 and i am on my trusty 7. Doors close and we start moving. "Grrrspssss". I must have heard that from 50 meters away. Weird shoe guy.

We get past sommaro and there is a bridge nearby that goes under, and i see a guy with a bike and a hat coming with loads of momentum down the hill. His hat falls down from the speed and that reveals a big bald head that was shiny like it was polished, i could see my reflection and my eyes were burning. His forehead was so big a Boeing 737 could take off from there. He luckily picked up his hat and my adventure continued.

I had planned to meet Andrea from Romania (she actually lives in Sala and is in great need of housing here so please help her. She also has a cute and obedient dog.) at 12:45 so i went to the University main building for the Welcome ceremony outside, near the statue. Cute girls passed by, then Andrea came and we finally met after months of talking.

The main building.

So we met some more people and we took some more photos, i tried to talk to Maria from Saint Petersburg but she looked disinterested so i moved on. Oh we also met a weird urban legend guy called Mattias or something. You can also spot Vasilis and Gregor behind.

Fun times. Stealing the show.

I spot my angel somewhere with a guy called Anton, who just vanished shortly after and we go inside the building. I think it was scary i knew so many people inside. The building was astonishing. More on it's history later. For now let's move around the tables with the various Nation info and see some more pictures.

Starting to get full.

And some more.

Gotlands nation had a nice ram head. On a stick.

I could spot my angel from the other side of the room without even trying. So i went up to her and told her we should take a picture with this girl.

Awww, so sweet.

I started taking pictures with everywhere, because i can. I also saw Roland and Anoud and she started like giving me challenges "talk to these people", "you are crazy", "you are a player", "take a photo with these girls". Funny i tell you. More photos incoming.

Just look at the building.

 And a view from the balcony.

People from all over the world flocking in the reception.

So i kept doing my thing and went in a boring master's students meeting about basic information, which i left shortly after. Oh a guy was so bored he was playing Texas Hold'em. On a 17 inch laptop on the ground. Because he can.

I looked for Vita so many times and each time we did something funny, like promoting some sort of bus tour to the Laplands. We were the admissions couple and when she was touching my hand or my back i felt a jolt going up my spine. Awwww so sweet. She had a scholarship meeting so i told her i will meet her after. We never saw each other again that day. I am a sad panda.

We go in the reception and the view is amazing. The building was presented as a government gift but when they finished it it was considered too luxurious so they refused to pay 2/3 of the cost. The builder paid for it. And died bankrupt and poor. But i guess he left a legacy. Tack.

Ridhima's mouth is humongous! That's Crystal and that's Jose.

 Oh i also met Madle from Estonia finally. We were supposed to live together in a caravan if we were homeless. Oh and A-nuuuuude!

My smile is contageous.

 Then i picked up a bunch of girls and told them to smile. I said "Mascarpone!" and all of them laughed! They are also Italian so it was extra belissimo! I met Cecilia, Laura and Nicoletta!

Cecilia, Laura and Nicky.

The are studying business in the Ekonomikum. Cecilia's skin is so soft and tanned and she is so cute in different circumstances i would have asked her out in a heartbeat.

Getting ready for the reception.

What an amazing architecture!

Some traditional dudes smiling with a uniform.

So the reception is fantastic. There was some royal orchestra that was off-tune, with the maestro glaring one of the violin players like all hell broke loose.

Him on the right next to dimitris!

The vice-chancellor of the University spoke, the Mayor wearing some sneakers, a girl from the student union and my favorite, the international student guide. He was a bit chubby, with a suit and a beard, really big cheeks and a red color like he drank too much red wine. He looked so boring but his voice was absorbing and mesmerizing. He was so funny. Every time he walked to talk i cheered and clap like a baboon.

"Yannis. 100% pure Colombian coffee."

 In the seats we also had King Harmeet, Kevin Falafel and many more Asians.

All hail King Harmeet. Coolest dude ever.

So Anoud tells me to meet some more girls. I talk to a cute one and she started running towards the exit. At least she would survive a caveat or a fire. I ran after her i think she felt scared. I also managed to take the picture with her friends.

Don't run away??

 More people everywhere. I only spoke to Caroline and Melissa, most of them were from the USA.

This is unreal!

We are done with the reception. I go with Cecilia and Laura, they get their bikes and we go towards Norrlands pub, Orvags Krog. Well they were strolling in their bikes, i was catching my breath because i was running. Tack.

So they lock their bikes and i meet some more people, Tobbias from Germany and Catherine from Wales. We teased her all night because she is from Great Britain, but she is actually really nice and funny and she is dressed so well. Classy. Oh she drinks cider too, like a sir.

Hey there sweetie.

We sit around a big table, were we have so much fun and see even more strange people and the waitress was actually greek. More people join us. We are like King Harmeet, General Kostas (meeee), Vasilis, Katherine, Tobbias, Cecilia, Laura, Alberto and three more Korean people.

So we are soooo hungry. I ate some sort of arabic pie but we decided we want pizza. So we went to Papa Something's pizza that nobody speaked italian, so we went instead to Pinocchio's. The owner's nose was bigger because he was also lying that the pizza was italian.

Hmmm what to get..

 We had such an amazing conversation and i was king of the house, entertaining everyone. I told them stories from the dark village and about the lumberjack with the small penis my friend was dating in the woods. Scary. Also i remember Alberto gave us a moment of fun.

"So we take a deck of cards" he says.

"A dick of cards? Wth??" i say.

"A DECK"

"A DICK??"

"A DEEEECK".

"Oh a deck."

We laughed so hard and ate our pizza's. We also learned 35 ways to call someone gay in Italian. Thank you Laura. The bottom line was that the water was sh$t, while the pizza was not so sh$t.

Back to Norrlands walking along the river. We sit in the pub on a massive desk, i spot two more cute swedish girls and they take a photo of us. We are so many, Raymon joined us with two more girls, Francesca from Italy, and a million other people from Greece and Spain. Ohhhh let's not forget Phoebe from Melbourne.

To infinity, and beyond!

More weirdly dressed people walked by, including this.

Harmeet also felt strange i guess when he saw Cruela DeVil.

So i am going back home, reflecting on all this. It's 23:17 and i am entering the door. I go up and collapse on my bed after talking to my huggie buddie Kelly. I hugged the pillow and dreamed of Vita's silky touch and hair.

Goodnight Uppsala.

30 minutes in the rain

Tuesday 26 August 2014

Waking up from last night, i checked out if i was at the right place or the right bed. I expected to be in a worse shape but i picked up my pieces quite fast. I'm impressed with my self. I would regain my composure and be a good boy tonight.

Yea right.

But let cut to the chase and start over. New day, new plans, new party.

So. It's like 11pm and i need to be at the Geocentrum. I take my trusty number 7 bus and stop at the Blasenhus, which is pretty much the Uppsala University main science/engineering campus. I see a map sign that shows the location of the centrum, trying to decode it because i'm slow in the morning.

Oh wait, two people are coming my way. Let's stop them because it's raining and i like to get wet.

"Do you know where the geocentrum is?"

"No! Do you know where is the department for nordic languages?"

"No, bye!"

So i keep moving and i ask some worker with a bald head like a globe, he points me to the wrong direction. Tack. I then see and older man that tells me where the correct building is but sends me to the wrong entrance. Tack. So i do a 200 meter walk around until i finally get to the correct way.

Oh wait! I see someone. He is with 2 others. He wears a checkered shirt, jeans and has a beard. He is Greek so i say "Geia sou!" and i met Yannis, a PhD student that takes me to the entrance.

Speechless.

So i enter the premises with some automatic doors opening while i walk. I felt like David Coperfield. I enter the room Norrlands 1 and meet my new colleagues. We are two greeks, spreading like a virus. I met the program helper Aby and the program coordinator Susanne. We did the basic stuff, i registered for my program, asked all the questions i had and received my welcome package.

I ate a nice sandwich with something that resembled greek feta. We were briefed on the campus's training facilities 1477 and the student mental support group. There was also a brief intro about Grus and Unt.

Then we divided in 4 groups or so and we had a short tour of the facilities, which are frankly, amazing. Massive library, clean places, microwaves and kitchen, study rooms that you can book to study quietly, 3 computer room and a biology lab, as well as 5-6 lecture rooms.

We have some students from Sweden following up from their batchelor's, one with a scholarship from Ethiopia, Ezre, Kate from the Netherlands, Kostas and Yannis from Greece, Lena from Germany, Stephanie from the USA, etc.

During our first meet.

We set up a meeting in Thursday @ 8:50 outside the faculty building for a bus tour/excursion and we went to the printing shop to get our student access. It was me, Alex and one more from Iceland. He got is access and then i went home like a sad panda because i am stupid and i did not have my driver's license with me so we could not complete, more or less start the register. Tack.

So i'm going back home, it's raining slightly and i am listening to some soothing drums and bass. I get on the bus with a weird granpa holding eggs like it's the precious one ring.

Oh i am so relaxed on my bed, talking to my buddy Kelly from Stockholm. I tell her dirty and stupid jokes and she laughs maniacally.

I get a message from Vita, my russian angel. The time is 5:44 and we set up a meeting at 6:15. The bus is leaving at 5:50 and i want to be there fast so i see her more...I forgot my umbrella, my ipad, my phone, my mind. I was not even sure of the nation i had to be at...So i found the Gotlands Nation where they had a crash course about sweden. It sucked because it lasted 10 minutes and they only asked 5 questions. I am outside speaking to some random dude and Maria from Ukraine.

She is nowhere to be seen. The time is 6:35. I see Roland and Anoud (A-nude. muahahaha). He sends a message for me to Vita in hope she sees it. I am off to the Gotlands pub which has a massive queue and i talk to James, a tall dude that works in the nation. And then Vita enters with Jose from Spain/USA. Everytime i look at her my heart stands still and so does time and space. I greet her warmly. She smells so nice and is so sweet. I play the sad panda face because she is late and we pretty much met by luck there.

Time to go to Norrlands pub. We sit there inside and we see Dimitris with his buddy program. We have some fun and i keep teasing Vita because i love her laugh and beaming smile. She makes me want to smile too. So we need some action and we talk to two random guys next to us. One is called Henrick (me thinks) and his half-swedish, half-greek (!) friend Andreas. We had the best of times, they actually bought us beers and we stayed there for 3-4 hours. It was amazing. I loved the part where they said that we make a nice couple ("blush mode on").

Dimitris, Jose, Henrich, Andreas and Vita.

So that was it, a fairly quieter night that the previous one, but get ready, because the storm is coming. Tomorrow is the Welcome Ceremony!

Welcome in Uppsala.